Working hard to make a living

No. Not me.

Well, I do work hard, but this time it is not me.

I have had some "WTF are they really old enough?" realisations in the last week. I am trying to be a responsible parent and encourage my daughters to learn financial responsibility (and I have lots of plans, travel and otherwise, and they all need to be financed so it really is mutually beneficial).

Tuesday last week I posted this status update on my personal account:
"Slight flaw to my keeping the Pixie last night plan*: having to take her to work with me this morning for a couple of hours. Bonus being that I lent her out to take down Christmas decorations, and read out asset numbers. If she is going to be here she might as well be useful right?"

I only had her with me for an hour before she met Tink and my sister, but in the meantime a friend told me he had some jobs they could do in his office for a couple of hours. I initially thought he was joking. Turns out he was serious. That afternoon Tink and Pixie went and helped take down Christmas decorations and count stock for a few hours. They must have been useful; he kept them a lot longer than I thought he would. I have no idea how explained them. Pixie was very confused by the question on the basis that my colleagues like them being at our office. Well in her world they do, and she could not comprehend how she would not be an asset to any office.

Then Saturday afternoon I helped Buglet write her very first CV. (By help I mean I told her to Google a template, helped her brainstorm what to put in the blanks, and proof read it for her. See. Help. I didn't actually do it for her). And then I took her to drop the CV off. Seriously. Talk about being grown up. Fingers crossed she gets the job. The hours would fit perfectly around her dance schedule and that doesn't happen often.

Saturday night, the girls were hired as waitresses for a friend's engagement party. Once they stopped squabbling they did an awesome job. I was ready to throttle them to start with. This has no real point other than a gentle reminder that I do vaguely attempt to keep it real on here. They all gave that money to me for their Bali fund. Hooray! Maybe some of the "you need to save a certain percentage for yourselves" talk is finally walking.

Sunday we worked hard all day. Tink and Pixie are fundraising to go to a Girl Guide jamboree. Sunday was our first sausage sizzle and we were there from 8am until almost 4pm.

8am: all enthusasitc
Thank you for the support Bunnings!

It is funny watching my vegetarian child be all enthusiastic about squeezing the sausages and watching the fat come out. I suppose when you don't eat them it isn't as gross.

Other forms of amusement for quiet times included crab impersonations (Tink is awesome at this), Pixie pretending to squash peoples heads with tongs (like "holding" the Eiffel Tower type movements); and laughing at Pixie freaking out because Buglet was "squashing" her head. (I don't know, don't ask).

3.30pm: Sleeping Pixie
I think we broke her.

It was worth the long day though. We reached the target we were hoping to reach. Just a few more to go now. In addition to the fundraising making it possible to send the girls, it was also a good way for them to realise the value of working to earn what you do (and hopefully them working out the value of realise how hard I work to support them. I can live in hope.).

Meanwhile. While Buglet was completing her CV, I was finding more space to house books I have acquired and making a much needed start on the pile of "stuff" that has accrued from cleaning other rooms.

I am totally convinced that "ability to creatively find more bookshelf space" is a legitimate addition to my CV. Buglet rolled her eyes when I made that suggestion.

Disclaimer:

• I am definitely not qualified to give financial advice.
• I am definitely not qualified to career advice.
• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any nature.
Except finding extra space for bookshelves, and extra space for books on existing shelves. I am great at that.

*rather then going to DB's house with the other two. We'd had a big week and she'd had a few sleepovers and needed some quiet time with Mummy.

Instructions

For those of you who haven't made it to being a high school parent yet, you should be warned: there are lots of rules. Not school imposed rules (although obviously there are those too) but child imposed rules.

Considering this is my third child going off to high school you would think that I would have it all sussed; I thought I had it pretty under control. Buglet and Tink haven't had too many complaints about me (although they have told me DB is very embarrassing when he drops them off, considering he does this on purpose this should make him happy).

I am pretty sure Buglet and Tink don't have a very high opinion of my capabilities so they just keep it simple. You don't want to complicate things too much for parents.

Pixie on the other hand has been busily giving me instructions for the last six months, and as the school year has progressed so has the intensity of the reminders. As I can only remember three clearly I have not been paying that much attention  The three I have remembered are:

• Not taking photos at school on the first day;
• Not getting out of the car to take photos on the last day; and
• Making sure her uniform is not baggy "because in books the youngest kids all have baggy uniforms and I don't want to be that person".

I suppose that is all sort of reasonable.

We went visiting on the weekend, and Buglet and Tink used the travelling time to discuss some of the finer points of high school. I was amused to hear them telling her things like where the best drink fountains were. Honestly, that would not have even crossed my mind.

My favourite conversation would have to be this one though ....

Tink: Don't be one of those people who gets changed in the toilets.
Pixie scornfully: I am a dancer.
pause
Pixie: Do I need to change my underwear?
Buglet: No. You can do that at home.

WTF? My children are so weird. Totally weird. Pixie for thinking to ask. Buglet for not thinking it was a strange question.

Everyone has been asking me if it is making me sad that my last child is leaving primary school. It is definitely the end of an era, and that is making me emotional, but life will get a little easier in lots of ways when they are all in high school.

As for them growing up .... Tink and the Pixie decided to engage in a "straw sword fight" after a first birthday party so I am not in much danger of them being all grown up yet!

Despite appearing on the blog, this game is not parental approved.

The pit falls of puppies

Firstly, a quick re-cap. In case you missed my earlier posts, Flip-Flop is the girls' puppy. Not mine. This is particularly handy when it comes to certain things, like me not having to clean up her mess. It would be even handier if she realised this and didn't try to sit on my lap when I was studying, or blogging (Like now. Flip-Flop sends big slobbery kisses to you all).

She had a big sulk this week when I wouldn't talk to her when I was finishing an assignment.

"Fine. If study is more important to you than me, I will destroy these curly things. So there."

I feel so strongly about her being the girls' dog, that I almost woke Pixie up to tell her to clean up her dog's mess in my bedroom the other night.

Pixie has asked me before why Flip-Flop is her puppy when I am mad at her. Tink pointed out that I say the same thing to their father about them when I am not happy. See? I don't play favourites.

I have known a few people who have got pets to practice before they had children. I never did this. Partly because I was 18 when I was pregnant with Buglet, partly because I never actually thought of it. Plus when I was 17 I acquired a 4 year old sister and an 18 month old sister. Clearly this didn't deter me from being a young mum so I doubt a pet would have.

However, I have finally worked out why it might be considered practice.

Tuesday night Flip-Flop got me up at least once every hour being upset by the storms. Also the Pixie woke me up when she came into bed with me, then woke me up again to swap sides.

Wednesday night Flip-Flop woke me up to be let outside. Then got distracted and ran down the road. Then came back inside. Then realised she hadn't actually been to the toilet. Then was super excited to see me. Then Pixie yelled at me for waking her up yelling at Flip-Flop. Then Pixie yelled at me in the morning for not letting Flip-Flop go sniffing down the street in case she'd been following the rabbit's trail (Our rabbit has escaped. A storm casualty). Apparently the fact it was 1am, I was in my pyjamas, and it was raining is not a good enough excuse.

I now get why pets are good practice for babies, or toddlers. I was standing there trying to reason with a dog in the middle of the night. I have been well and truly reminded about some of the positives to my baby and toddler days being over. Two nights of broken sleep have been rough! This is the reason for no blog posts. I have been too tired when I have made it home. I had forgotten what it was like, and have no idea how I managed for 6 years without sleep.

I suspect I am going to be a very slack grandmother.

Just in case you are in any doubt about how much I love the puppy, my favourite thing to do at the moment is to make her rush past the girls to say hello to me. This annoys them a lot. Just saying.

I also suspect I am a mean mother.

The puppy loves me though. She comes to "kiss" me goodnight. It took me a few nights to realise that is what she's doing, but she comes and nuzzles me before she goes to bed. Just like the girls. I blame the Pixie for teaching her to "kiss" people. This is much nicer after the first few times when I dragged my butt out of bed to let her outside, only to be given the "Huh? What are you doing?" look. She really is like the girls. They do that a lot too. None of this is helping with the campaign to get another dog.

Facebook: The case in support

There are a lot of arguments against facebook, in particular that it is possibly one of the biggest aids to procrastination that this century has produced.

It doesn't suit everyone, and that is fine. If it doesn't make your life a happier place, it may not be the right thing for you. I could just as easily write 'The case against Facebook', there is definitely a case for that too.

My darling youngest daughter might think I like arguing (my parents and sisters probably also agree). However, I would like it on the record that the fact I don't actually enjoy arguing for the sake of it, I have spent a lot of time and effort (not to mention incurring a stupidly big HECs debt) learning how to present both sides of an argument. This is very useful, if somewhat annoying (to me, and I imagine to other people), and if anything means I argue less because I don't often bother discussing things if people are incapable of considering things from a different point of view. Or it could be because I am lazy these days.

But today, I am arguing in favour of facebook. Today, the Entourage were home alone. After feeling a little ignored and anxious all day (in between stressing over work), I posted this status: Reasons to have facebook: Your teenage children will like/comment on posts even when they don't reply to text messages or call you.

Subtle much?

It also reminded me of the Buglet's first babysitting experience. I went to my primary school reunion two years ago. This meant travelling to Kalgoorlie, so I booked us into a hotel just down the road from the adult only evening event with strict instructions to call me if they needed me for anything. Within five minutes Buglet had the laptop connected to the internet (even though I had spent half an hour trying and gave up), and was on facebook. I got a text message later from one of my best friends telling me not to worry, if anything went wrong facebookworld would know because she would suddenly stop appearing in their newsfeeds and someone would ring me. How helpful is that?!

Pixie is a little addicted to seeing how many likes our facebook blog page has (she isn't allowed facebook yet, but she likes to check up and see via my page).

Tink is a binge facebooker. I will get massively excited because I suddenly have 20 plus notifications, to find they are all from Tink. At least she likes me enough to facebook stalk me. This is a good thing right?

Apparently being a facebook addict is hereditary.

I love this top. I don't wear it in public, but I have it hidden just in case Buglet tries to claim it.

So here are my top 10 reasons for loving facebook:

1. I am really busy. I use facebook to keep up to date with people who matter to me. I know it isn't the most personal method, but I feel more connected, and often I can read between the lines and make sure there are more personal messages, calls and visits too. Facebook chat is great for every day conversations as well as for proper letter-type messages. I also have depression. For me part of this manifests in anxiety and feeling guilty if I don't catch up with people. I know, egocentric much?
2. One of the hardest thing about being a single parent is that you don't have someone at home to share the little things with. I noticed this a lot when I was on my own when my big two were babies. I haven't felt that as much this time. Partly because I have super awesome friends who I text and share all my news with, but partly because thanks to facebook I get to share my proud mama moments without feeling like I am harassing anyone.
3. I wouldn't have called myself an attention seeker, but I have a sneaking suspicion that I might be (Blogging about my life?! This may also be a sign). Hmm .... also see point 1.
4. I like writing. I get a lot of enjoyment out of writing (what I think are) entertaining updates.
5. I make a genuine effort to focus on the positives in my life. This is a big part of the way I handle my life. Facebook helps me channel the positives.
6. I love seeing pictures and hearing stories about all the adventures other people have. Sometimes it is inspiring, other times it is just fun to live vicariously through other peoples holidays.
7. I have had a chance to connect with family members who live in the Eastern states. I grew up on the other side of the country to most of them and we haven't seen much of each other since annual visits in primary school. I have had two families of cousins come to stay with me in the last few years, and thanks to facebook it hasn't felt like strangers.
8. I like reading random things and I am insanely nosey.
9. I am a massive procrastinator.
10. It is another way I can communicate with my teenagers, and anything that helps us bond in a positive way has to be a good thing in at least some ways.

But in addition to using facebook to parent, I am also a big fan of bribery. I told the girls if they were good today and didn't fight, I would take them to get some dvds out tonight. Pixie also did an amazing job of not annoying her sick sisters and she cleaned her room so it is spotless! This feels frozen-coke-spider worthy. (I am ignoring the fact I have been asking her to do this for weeks, today she did it without being asked .... so let's focus on the positives!).

Be careful what you wish for .....

On Saturday I took Flip-Flop for her own playdate at the beach with a friend and her two dogs (and her baby so I spent a lot of time babbling at the baby. Flip-Flop didn't care about the baby).

She had a wonderful time. I had been a bit worried because she hadn't met these dogs before, and I didn't know how she would go with them.

Sandy puppy. The Pixie insists that after-beach selfies are now a tradition.

I had always said if I got a dog, I would get two so they weren't lonely during the day. We got Flip-Flop as an "only dog" so the issue had never really come up again. Her beach adventures made me re-think.

I may have mentioned this to the girls. (Please note, I do realise that this may not have been my most sensible move). Buglet and Tink thought it was a great idea. Pixie thought it was a horrible idea. She can't imagine loving any dog as much as she loves Flip-Flop. I reassured her that lots of people worry about that when they have their second baby.

Me: Do you think I love Buglet and Tink any less because I had you?
Pixie: Yes!

Oops. Maybe not the best converation to have with my diva baby! On the upside, at least she isn't worried that I don't love her. I did find out later though that Pixie told Buglet that her real concern is that Flip-Flop will love the Pixie less if she has another dog to be her friend. This makes a lot more sense.

Fast forward to today .... I get a phone call in the office.

Buglet: So we have a big little friend visiting us.
Me: Huh. Who's there?
Buglet: We have a visiting dog.
Me: What do you mean?! Where did a dog come from?
Buglet: It came up and was barking at the rabbit and he doesn't have a collar.
Me: Where is this dog now?!
Voices around the office. A dog? Did she say they have a dog? What have they done?
Buglet: In the house.
Me: Where is Flip-Flop?
Buglet: Outside.
Me: Get the dog outside and put Flip-Flop inside. I will warn Apple there is a dog there when she comes to get you.
Buglet: Pixie wants to call it 'Mr Fluffykins'.
Me: No! I am sure he has an owner.

Get off the phone to fill my colleagues in on the other half of the conversation. I am so glad they find it amusing rather than getting annoyed by my phone calls with the girls.

Follow an exchange of text messages. Buglet wanting to walk to the dog. Finding out that Buglet was outside keeping the dog company (I should have got her to do some weeding while she was there). Buglet telling me that his name was Spike (Buglet and Tink outvoted the Pixie apparently).

Apple to the rescue! 'Spike' is now safely at the vet, with my name and number though in case they can't find his owners.

If I get a call I will let you know. Just to be perfectly clear, my conversation was not a message to the universe that I need another dog at this point, and tonight I will be discussing dog etiquette with the girls.

Mama Bear and her babies

I survived my first day of this intensive week. Just. This will be a super short post.

I must have looked shattered when I made it home. Buglet took one look at me and told me to go to sleep. I curled up straight on the couch and went to sleep. Just staying awake long enough to have a cupcake shoved in my mouth by the Pixie. Buglet had made red velvet mini cupcakes this afternoon, and Pixie informed me later that she'd made very blue icing all by herself. It was very blue. Tink was all soccered out. She fell asleep on top of me about 30 seconds after I lay down. I love our couch! It is big enough for all four of us to snuggle on - and sleep!

Today's ironic moment was getting a frantic phone call from Pixie during a class on managing stress and work-life balance. A frantic phone call from Pixie either means something is very wrong or her she needs to dob on her sisters for something or she is not sure if she is allowed to eat some sort of food.

Me: What's wrong baby? Is it important? I am in class?
Pixie: No! Sorry. *slams down phone*

She wanted to know if she was allowed to have Guide biscuits. Luckily it was during a small group discussion. Since she did ring a few times a little more information would have been handy now. Apparently, Buglet made an executive decision in my absence. Some moments I feel like I have the work-life balance sorted, however fleeting those moments may be!

I did however still manage to make bear ears tonight. For some unknown reason Pixie knew exactly where the brown felt was that was left over from her mouse costume for book week 6 years ago. No idea where or how, it wasn't with the rest of the felt. As an added bonus, Buglet had been using the stapler, so that was where it was supposed to be.

Staplers are a point of contention in this house. There is never one around when I need one. I think I bought one per assignment for my first three years of law until I threatened to staple the girls' hands to the desk if I had to buy another one. That one stayed on the desk for at least 18 months. Potentially not my finest parenting moment, but I must have looked serious .... it worked!!

Daddy Bear ears and Baby Bear ears. Mummy Bear's ears were a point of contention. I thought they should go on a hat too. Pixie disagreed. I gave up. She is apparently going to stick them on using bobby pins.

Not the most artistic effort, but I think they will do! Sometimes your best is all you can do at the time. This is important. Feel free to remind me of this.