The important things

The Month of Visiting Country People has begun! Maybe a little late, but it has begun. Last weekend I headed out to visit my very pregnant primary school BFF solo. (The girls had gone camping with DB). That was the first of four weekends when I am heading down country roads.

Holidaying can be expensive. I was trying to teach the girls the cost of life ...

Me: I hope none of you have any major expenses this moth. Between four new tyres on Paris, and paying for the hotel for Bali, I am feeling pretty broke.
Pixie *sternly to her sisters*: And she's had to buy me birthday presents.

See! I didn't forget!

You have to love a very subtle reminder that her birthday is up there on the important things that need to be included in the budget!

I had to laugh though. Pixie requested stuff for her bedroom. She had given me some suggestions after we went to Ikea a few weeks ago. She especially wanted "coke hangers". She specifically mentioned that it would be a good present for me to get her. How could you refuse a request like that? She was so excited. She insisted that her "coke hangers" be included in a picture!

(Pixie absolutely refuses to call them anything other that "coke hangers". Even now. I have given up on that fight.)

"Mummy! My coke hangers!"

Yesterday Pixie turned 12. I had been mentally preparing for another big party. Pixie had previously said she wanted to have her big "teenager" party this year, but she has since decided to wait until next year when she turns 13. After having Buglet's 16th a few weeks ago, I have to admit I won't be sorry to wait another year. I want them all to feel that their big events are special in their own right. I do try very hard to make sure they all feel they are their own separate individuals as well as being part of a family, especially since they are so close in age.

Part of this decision, included a last minute request to have her squad (the new word for group of people you hang out with at school, apparently, do you feel like you've learnt something new today), sleepover. This felt reasonable. To have the sleepover, Pixie also said that she would work super hard getting the house nice and clean. this also felt reasonable.

Wednesday ended up being a bitch of a day a work. There is no other way to describe it. I am pretty lucky with my job. I do work long days, and some days I work super long days, but I work in an area of law where it is unusual for to unexpectedly need to be in the office until awful hours of the night. Wednesday ended up being one of those days. Luckily KK picked up the girls for Guides, Apple drove them home, and Team Awesome Guide Leaders said they could manage without me (it was lovely of them to imply that they could cope rather than pointing out that they don't really need me, which is the actual case). I got home at 11pm to a sleepy Pixie who made me promise to wake her up at 5am on Thursday so she could finish cleaning.

Late night work supper. My colleagues are awesome.

I woke up at 5am to help clean. And then my darling child asked me if I was just procrastinating when we went on an early morning drive to get bread! I did point out that while I am brilliant at procrastinating, I do not get up at 5am to clean and then procrastinate. Turns out she just thought of the word. Seriously! Children these days!

It was worth it though. Pixie had a lovely sleepover last night.

Luckily the cleaning was done early. All three of her friends ended up arriving before I got home from work. I had said drop off at 6.30pm if they wanted me to be there, but turned out all the parents were fine with me not being home for the first bit. I walked into a house with music rocking and a cry of "I can't believe you have a stripper pole! You are so cool! I like you already!".

Did I mention I hadn't met one of Pixie's friends before? And that her older sister is friends with Tink, so she came for a sleepover too? Pixie has learnt something from her sisters; if you let them have their own friend they will leave your celebrations alone! Hopefully they will mention the law degree along with the stripper pole or they may never be allowed to sleepover again.

Just for the record, I don't call it a stripper pole. Just a dance pole. And the girls know I do pole dancing because I am too uncoordinated for real dancing. I like to have something to hang on to so I don't fall over.

Happy Birthday Pixie!
(The garden fairies from across the road put on the candles)

Today we are heading on our next country adventure. We are driving up to Boddington to have dinner with DB for the Pixie's birthday.

I asked the Pixie if she would like to go up to have dinner with Daddy on her birthday weekend. Her response: "I think he should like that. I get to pick where we have dinner though. Out of the two  places".

We are planning on doing an alphabet photo scavenger hunt on the way. Check out #alphabetadventures and #krisangels  on Twitter or Instagram if you want to see our pictures!

Disclaimer:

• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I have nothing against strippers, but not sure if it the girls' friends' parents would be thrilled b the image.
• I have no idea how I raised children who want coat hangers as birthday presents.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any nature.

One down. Eleven to go.

One down. Eleven to go.

Put like that it sounds a little daunting. It was just yesterday they were all finishing primary school.

Buglet just finished her mid-year 11 exams. Three more semesters to go and then she has finished high school. That is followed by four semesters of upper school for Tink, and then four semesters for Pixie. Beginning of the end? (I will cross post-secondary stressors later, I need to get the first one through high school first).

In case you were wondering, she seems to have survived.

The biggest issue has been from people other than Buglet. She's been a little stressed, but you would expect that. And our normal schedule has been a little out of whack, but once again you expect that.

What did surprise me was how I reacted to Buglet's exams.

I am an awful student. I do genuinely love knowing stuff, but I have some how managed to survive high school and multiple degrees without ever really learning how to study. I do the readings (mostly). I go to lectures (pretty much always, I am petrified of missing out on exam or assignment tips*). But somehow I never managed to learn how to make notes, how to review, how to do all those things which help you to actually study. People don't believe me, but it is true! I managed to survive based on natural ability, good luck, and learning to live with the fact that my grades are not really a true indication of my ability. Mostly I credit good luck.

*Incidentally also the reason I rocked up to the last class of semester with a 6 day old Buglet.

The girls' school is amazing and their attention to the career pathway process, beginning in Year 10, was better than I could ever have dreamed. Buglet hasn't had the easiest time transitioning into some parts of Year 11. She has struggled a little with some of the ATAR (university pathway) subjects, and it upset me that I didn't have the tools to help her.

She got some help from Apple, some from her teachers, and some from DB. Buglet is pretty happy to have finished her exams and says she is pretty sure she passed. Just have to wait now!

DB spent a day sitting with Buglet and helping her prepare for her final study. He helped her timetable and organise her study time, and helped her go through her notes. This bothered me, and I hate that it bothered me. Don't get me wrong, I am so, so glad that he did.

But, the irrational part of me had a few things to process ...
... guilt, I should have found the time to do that.
... frustration, I manage to do the every day stuff, and he swans in at the last minute.
... annoyance, is this is a criticism of me for not having looked after her better?
... guilt, study is supposed to be my thing. I do the learning stuff, he does the practical stuff.

Unreasonable? Yes! Absolutely! He is her dad, and he helped out, and did a much better job than I could have. And I promise that there is no resentment! Just the never-ending battle of mother-guilt, and the unavoidable frustrations of co-parenting with an ex. (Let me repeat here, the issue is definitely me in this instance! I didn't say anything to him except "thank you very much, you made a big difference" 'cos he did. Unless he reads this blog in which case my cover is blown#).

#DB: Just remember, baby, you told me to write a blog. And I mean it, the crap feelings are all about me. You did an awesome job helping Buglet. Go Team!

The other thing that I wasn't expecting was tantrums from Pixie.

The girls have watched me study for years. They know the importance of study food. For me study food usually consists of Pepsi Max, chocolate and cheezels or chicken twisties. I have promised them that when they sit exams I will not only provide them with study food (the Pixie's main concern) but also I will be there to cook, make coffee, and replenish empty Pepsi Max glasses. I would not have got through the last two years of study without Buglet's taking over most of the cooking, and Tink seemingly to fill my glass before I'd realised it was empty.

I should also say, that because I am a responsible parent, study food is reserved for exam study (and in my case last minute assignment writing, but the girls are much better than I am at not doing this).

Study food survival kit; given to me by a friend to help me survive the last weeks

I dropped the little to off to school on Buglet's first day of exam week. She was home study. I endured a lecture from Pixie because I hadn't provided Buglet  with appropriate study rations. I promised her I would text DB and request that he rectify the situation at some point, which I did do and he rose to the occasion.

That night there were major dramas because Buglet didn't share her study food. I am now suspecting that the Pixie's concern attend to my duties in supporting Buglet may have been partially motivated by the hope that she would get some too.

Pixie was most indignant because is "studying too". There was much soothing of the moral upset, and validation of feelings. This was all balanced with the not-so-subtle reminder that not everything is about her, and reminding her they all get special stuff at different times depending on what they have going on in their lives. It is a hard life being the youngest (and being totally spoilt).

To end on a happy note, it's taken me a few days to write this post, so since I started Buglet has found out she passed one of her exams! Yay! I am so, so happy! Just waiting to hear about the other two now!


Disclaimer:

• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I am not qualified to give study advice.
• I am not qualified to give nutritional advice.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any type.

Birthday Bonanza

We've had three birthdays in the household since last time I have written.

Firstly, I am counting May 2014 as this blogs official start date. There were a couple of early posts in December 2013, but May 2014 was where we really kicked off! Appropriately with a Mothers' Day post. Happy Anniversary to us! I have just realised that this year of blogging means I am now able to share historical blog posts on social media, I feel I have reached a new level of blog maturity.

It has also been 12 months since we got Paris the Yaris. Considering the amount of time we spend in her I think this is definitely worth a mention. This blog would not be the same with the chatting opportunities that being in the car gives us. It does bother me a bit though that after 12 months the Pixie still gets very excited every times she sees another Yaris. I don't care how exciting it is I am still not beeping my horn hello every time I see another Yaris. I don't care if it makes Paris sad.

(Please note, I didn't re-read the early posts in case they make me cringe. Does anyone else hate re-reading what they wrote? My usual reaction is what was I thinking!).

Perhaps more importantly, May was also Buglet's 16th birthday. Not just any old birthday, her 16th birthday! I wrote a lovely, heartfelt post to Buglet last year. I didn't this year. Not that I don't feel lovely, heartfelt things about her, but this year I showed by love with Extreme Cleaning rather then beautiful blog posts.

Look! Birthday muffins on the actual birthday. Bought with love.

I've mentioned before that May was the Month of Domestic Godessing, and Buglet's birthday was the reason for this. When they were little they had a birthday (of the McDonald's variety mostly) pretty much every year. Followed by a big part when they were 12 or 13 (their pick), but then I said no more parties until they were 16 and they've done something little a few friends instead. The plan has always been a big party for 16, a grown-up celebration for 18 (aka no drunken brawls, underage drinking friends etc), and then I would host a final big party for their 21st (Are you all a little bit impressed by my forward thinking? I will let you know how it all works out in 9 years when the Pixie is getting ready to turn 21. Buglet and I have discussed a joint 21st/40th so I do have hopes that my theory is sound).

We did so much cleaning and gardening and sorting; cupboards, boxes, drawers. It feels great to have some massive jobs crossed off my to-do list. Not enough to make this a full-time hobby, but it still felt good.

My mask: it petrified two of my nephews.

Buglet had a 'Masquerade Gala'. Family from 5pm to 7pm followed by her school and dance friends from 7pm to 10pm. We enlisted the help of some super awesome friends with the decorating, and DB did a great job with the food as always.

In the interests of sharing the benefits of my experience with you, here are some of the things I have learnt from this party:

• You don't put parents' contact details for RSVPs on 16th birthday party invites. Buglet informed me that this caused great amusement with her friends.
• 'Gala' can be misinterpreted as 'Galah'. 
• Masks scare toddlers and babies.
• If people offer to help, accept it. 
• Don't offer to help if you don't want people to accept 'cos they just might.
• Teenage girls wear Very High Heels and Very Short Skirts.
• Ex-husbands may leave scary looking tools at your house if they know teenage boys are going to be there. 
• They may also do things like sharpen knives using power tools.
• Don't try and sneak alcohol. You will be caught. Me, not the children. 
• If you've survived 16 years of parenting, you should get to celebrate too!

Buglet's big tip is to allow your sisters to have their own friends there. Buglet conducted her own negotiations with the Pixie, and the Pixie had two friends and a cousin sleepover on the condition that they didn't harass the "big kids". I think Buglet was less concerned about Tink, but Tink had a friend sleep over and they conducted their own party in the front room with a few other extra kids. Pixie and her entourage partied in the play room, and a fun time was had by all.

t was a great night. It was lovely to celebrate the early part with people who have love us and have helped Buglet grow into the person she is today, and Buglet's friends seemed to have a great time too. Saying this, back-to-back parties are exhausting. Especially when followed by a post-party de-brief with one or two of my friends and the girls' friends who slept over!

I spent the post-party day in bed. Literally. I only got out of bed to eat left over party food, and for other necessities and actually spent most of the day asleep. Particularly impressive as there were six girls that got picked up at random points during the day. I got up at 5.30pm to do a quick tidy, but was back in bed (in clean pyjamas!) by 7pm. So, so worth it!

Buglet sneakily invited DB around for breakfast on her birthday so that I wouldn't take photos or anything before she was dressed and all 'presentable'. Her theory being that if we were waiting until he got there to do presents and muffins she would be able to get up and get ready. The little two were a bit sorry they didn't think of this.

The girls on the birthday morning.

PS: Future posts relating to bits I wanted to include in this but decided it would make the post way to long: Scouts, performing arts, Pixie on birthdays, remembering what you've said to your children,
and 'it takes a village'. Intrigued? Keep following!

Disclaimer:

• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I am not qualified to give event planning advice.
• I have no idea what is trending in the real world.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any nature.

Bouncing by

Like a ball ... or an Easter bunny.

Yep, this is my greatly delayed Easter post. For my regular readers (hello!) my work life has changed back to normal levels of business after the five weeks of absolute insanity, and after the choir performance and legitimate soap box moment on Saturday, my Guide life has gone back to normal too. (Soap boxing and choir will get a post of its own later).

So ... finally back to Easter.

We had a good one! I've written about our Good Friday Fremantle adventures separately, but I did have a particularly proud moment.  My heart may have swelled with pride over the cry of "Look Mama! A selfie with books". Our official family motto is "There Is No Such Thing As Too Many Books". Tink decided this at about the same time as she created our family coat of arms.

Back to the rest of Easter. This year was the first Easter Buglet has been home ages. The last three years she has been camping with one of her friends.

She has grown up.

*SPOILER ALERT, IF YOU BELIEVE IN MAGIC DO NOT READ THE NEXT PARAGRAPH*

Buglet informed me that as they all know there is no such the Easter Bunny (I told you not to read it? Who told my children such travesties), that she should hide the eggs this year because "you will have more fun looking for them than I will, Mother". Oh. Ok. Fair enough. To be honest, I had a great time looking for them! Buglet said hiding them wasn't as much fun as she had thought though so, who knows, I may get to be the parent again next year.

Our Easter tradition is that we give pyjamas as a house family for Easter. It means the girls can pick out whatever they want for me, I can give them something (because the Easter Bunny leaves the eggs!), and that we all have something new to wear which is a very old Easter tradition. Practically, it also means they have new winter pyjamas.

Easter pyjamas and bed socks
Tink, me and Pixie, Buglet

Because I am the world's best ex, I took the girls to visit DB at work for dinner on Easter Sunday. 

Daddy's Angels

Because I am the world's worst mother, I may have worn my lovely leopard print pyjamas to dinner.

Pixie had been grumpy with me all day because I had insisted on wearing my Awesome Red Hat. I kept teasing her and telling her that I was going to wear it all day. I had driven up to Boddington in my pyjama pants (because they were comfy), but I had intended on changing. I told the Pixie I was going to wear them to dinner just to tease. DB said I could wear pyjamas, but I couldn't wear my Awesome Red Hat. I decided to pick the pyjamas. He also said I would not be the only one in the pub in pyjama pants, and he was right! Pixie was so mortified that when I sent her sisters outside for fighting she went to because "I don't want to be seen with the pyjama lady". It was a nice quiet 5 minutes. 

Dinner at the pub ...
 and they think I am the embarrassing one!

I am pretty good at trying to not embarrass the girls, but sometimes, just sometimes I can't help myself.

Awesome Red Hat

My hat is awesome. I don't know why the Pixie hates it. Example below (in case you missed in on Facebook).

I found the Pixie wandering around in my Awesome Red Hat.

Me *happy*: Aw. You are wearing my hat!

Pixie *smiling sweetly*: I am going to hide it so you can never wear it again.

Luckily my evil fairy child hid it on the hat stand. Sneaky! 

Disclaimer:

• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I am not an expert on Easter traditions.
• My children tell me I should not be allowed to give fashion advice.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any nature (except possibly on book choices, but then, please take at your own risk).

When good mothers go bad

I had so much fun with my last Good Mama, Bad Mama post that I decided to do it again. This may be end up being a regular fature.

No-one is perfect, and it is good to remember that. Plus overall I think I do ok.

I may also have been inspired by similar type posts on other blogs.

        *******************************************************************

Not-So-Good Mama Moment (NSGM): Leaving Tink at home sick - while I was at work and Guides.

Good Mama Moment (GMM): Being a Guide leader not only for the benefit of my girls, so lots of girls and women can get the benefit of Guiding.

NSGM: Telling Buglet and the Pixie not to pick stupid goggly eyes so they didn't wreck "my" set of TMNT Christmas decorations.

GMM: Making my decoration (I had Raphael) with sparkly ball to match Pixie's Donatello so we had two sparkly and two not sparkly ones.

NSGM: I didn't tell her Buglet off for re-making the one Apple made for Tink because she wasn't satisfied with the quality.

NSGM: Having to write a note to Pixie's teacher to explain that she got banana all over her school book.

TBMM (aka Total Bragging Mama Moment): Buglet got 80% on her English is exam which is massive because she did not do very well at all last semester and she got a decent mark on Science. She has been working so super hard.

NSGM: Taking Buglet and the Pixie to a leaders' meeting with me. Sometimes you just need to do these things.

NSGM: Bribing the Pixie with a frozen coke to not complain (I seem to be doing this way too often lately).

TBMM: Buglet and the Pixie were super good during my two hour meeting and read quietly.

NSGM: Reneging on the promised frozen coke because it was so late, and they ended up with take-away for dinner. Pixie accepted the IOU very graciously.

GMM: I am setting a good example to my children about civic responsibility and contributing to the community.

GMM: Having the right money and remembering to fill in all the forms before  they were due.

TBMM: Tink and Pixie played waitresses beautifully at a friend's party.

NSGM/GMM: Reminding Buglet that a bad maths mark isn't the end of the world, and that I have always reminded them that if they don't do the work they will be the ones to suffer (I felt awful, but I am pretty sure this is actually a good parenting moment).

NSGM: Going off at Tink for using and removing my lipstick (Seriously though!).

GMM: Organising to have all the dancing drop offs and pick ups beautifully coordinated.

NSGM: Being 45 minutes away when I received the text that they were finishing early ... in 30 minutes.

GMM: Night of culture and grandmother bonding (With DB's mum. Not me. Clearly I am not their grandmother).

NSGM: Leaving the girls at home why I went to a brunch meeting.

GMM: Coming home and being totally overwhelmed because they'd not only done the tidying I had asked them to do, they had done more.

NSGM: Going to have a nap (I was quite sick over the weekend) and leaving Buglet in charge of making high tea.

GMM: Taking the girls to their grandfather's high birthday tea. (DB's dad).

Flip-flop says: Let me play too!

GMM: Evening on the beach with the little two and the puppy.  Letting the puppy hide behind me so she didn't get wet. Letting the girls work out their own water fight rules.

GMM: Delivering up on the frozen coke promise from Thursday.

Bonus points for doing all this while dying from man flu (it is still a bit hit and miss as to whether I will survive. If you don't hear from me again, you will now know what has happened).


Disclaimer:

• Do not attempt a similar post unless you are sure it will work out to be an overall positive. You do not want to end up feeling worse about yourself.
• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any nature.

Good Mama, Bad Mama

The last week has been full of highs and low. I know this is true for every week, but this week has felt a bit more see-sawy than others. To give myself perspective I have decided to write a list of my good Mama and not-so-good Mama moments.

I may also have been inspired by similar type posts on other blogs.

Good Mama Moment (GMM): Pixie packing for camp all by herself.

Not-So-Good Mama Moment (NSGM): Having the horrible realisation that I hadn't sent any spending money with her. In my defence, she wouldn't show me the kit list. (Thanks Apple for telling me to toughen up over this one. You were right; she was fine).

GMM: Planning time to make Pixie feel special for coming home from camp, and at the same time not overshadowing Tink's birthday.

GMM: Finishing work on time on agenda day (this is impressive) so I was at the train station on time to pick up Pixie.

GMM: Dinner with DB, because family birthday time is important. Bonus points for there being very little fighting with one over-excited birthday girl, one over-tired baby home from camp, one grouchy teenager, and one grumpy ex-husband coming off night shift.

Amusing themselves at dinner.

NSGM: Being told off by Pixie for colouring in her picture. I picked the wrong colour.

NSGM: Posting a mushy status update: All my girls are home safely with me (big two tucked up in bed, the little one curled up asleep next to me). My puppy is snoring on her couch. I am in my pyjamas with a glass of red wine and a good book. Life is good. Then realising that Buglet had said good night to me twice and that Tink was actually across the road getting her hair cut.

GMM: Being a super awesome backstage ninja.

NSGM: Deciding the puppy was my favourite child because she doesn't fight.

NSGM: Tink broke herself and I sent her to Apple because I was busy helping someone else. (I did take her to x-ray later that night and she is all good).

NSGM: Totally forgetting to buy the girls' confirmation presents even though I knew exactly what I wanted. (My sister came to the rescue and bought it for me because I was at rehearsals all day Saturday. She is totally awesome).

TBMM (aka Total Bragging Mama Moment): Being so super proud of my girls at confirmation.

BAM (aka Bad Auntie Moment): Scratching my youngest nephew's ear when I was cuddling him in church, and making him bleed.

GMM: Sharing the babies nicely with everyone else at the celebration lunch.

GMM: Taking the little two to the movies so Buglet could study.

GMM: Dropping the girls off at school on Monday because Buglet had exams and there were thunderstorms.

GMM: Remembering to buy Buglet study food (I had promised the Pixie that when she had exams I would buy her "study food" and I figured this would apply to the others too).

NSGM: Not realising that Buglet doesn't eat cheezles. To me these are the ultimate study food. How I have a daughter who doesn't eat them I don't know.

NSGM: This status update: Snuggled up in bed, just about to go to sleep when I realise that the Pixie is still wandering around. If I was a better mother I would get up and find out why (instead of posting here so I remember to find out later). I never bothered finding out.

NSGM: Leaving Tink at home sick.

NSGM: Bribing Pixie with a McDonald's hashbrown so she wouldn't have a tantrum about being dropped off at school early.

NSGM: Telling Pixie not to tell her sisters that I bribed her with a hashbrown.

GMM: Delegating parenting stuff to DB (and Apple). Parenting is a team effort.

I am pretty sure I have balanced it out overall. You have to take the good with the bad! Keeping it real peoples. You can't be perfect all the time.

Disclaimer:

• Do not attempt a similar post unless you are sure it will work out to be an overall positive. You do not want to end up feeling worse about yourself.
• It is doubtful I am qualified to give parenting advice, there is still time for me to stuff up.
• I am not even allowed to give legal advice without supervision.

I would recommend finding more reliable sources for any advice of any nature.

Faith, Love, and Chocolate

It was a big weekend for us! And one of those weekends which made me desperately want to clutch for any of those precious moments where the Entourage are still my babies, and not young adults functioning in their own lives.

On Friday, Miss Tink turned 14. She is so grown up now that it is unbelievable. In the last 12 months she has lost the last of her baby features, and has grown into a stunning young lady. She has also taken to high school like she was born to be there, being on the student council and organising events.



Turtle cupcakes for Tink!

A couple of weeks ago I got a text from the school saying she wasn't in class. I messaged back saying that as it was a free dress day I imagined she was somewhere doing something for that. I was right.

Friday was also the day the Pixie returned from camp. The Pixie is my youngest, so I have sent my babies on camps, both through school and Guides, lots of times. Even though I was mentally prepared for it, that moment when they come home just that little bit more mature than when they went away still takes my breath away.



A little bit older

I am not exactly sure how the Pixie's camp experience actually went. Most of the other kids had gastro. Pixie was one of the lucky few who escaped. The ones who were well enough did all the activities, but all Pixie has told me about is all the vomit stories in great detail. I have no intention of sharing those stories.

I was all set to hear all about camp on the car trip home; to give her some time in the spotlight before we got home to celebrate Tink's birthday.

The Pixie told me that car trips are for sleeping and napped the whole way home.

She woke up in time to drive down our road ....
Pixie: Oh. Is the father one here?
Me: Looks like it.
Pixie: Why?
Me: Um it is Tink's birthday, and he usually has you on the Fridays he is home*.
Pixie: Oooh!!! My puppy! I can see my puppy! I missed my puppy. She is my favourite!

She then had a tantrum because we were going out for a house family dinner for Tink's birthday, and she was very tired after camp.

Yep, my Pixie is still my Pixie and not all grown up yet.

Dance rehearsals took all day Saturday. Once again Tink and organisational abilities took my breath away. She filled in for someone who was absent side of stage, while still dancing, and keeping me informed what song was being performed. (I am in charge of the quick change room). I am predicting big things for Tink if she keeps going like this! (No pressure though, baby-girl. Mummy just wants you to be happy). 


Tink and the Pixie have been doing hair for dance concerts for the last 3 years.
I am still in charge of make-up.
 And glittering people. I love glittering people.

Rehearsal day was marred by a hurt foot, and a trip to Emergency. Tink is ok. Very relieved with her Singapore soccer trip coming up in a few years. Buglet is determined not to be hurt this year. Two years ago she danced on a cracked tail bone, and last year she didn't dance because she'd just come out of a moon boot after a fractured foot. The Pixie says she is the best child because she doesn't get broken. I think this is mostly because she is so bendy.

On Sunday, Buglet and Tink were confirmed as adult members of the Lutheran Church. I am so proud of them. They looked so grown up (I will ask them if I can share pictures). It is yet another big stepping stones to them being grown-ups and responsible for their own lives.

I also got lots of baby cuddles from my youngest two nephews (and be shouted at by Pie, and hang out with my eldest niece and nephew). Definite bonus to family occasions. It was nice to have that reminder that even as my girls get big, we are part of a massive family and that is important too.

Finally, today Buglet is sitting year 10 exams. She politely requested that I take her younger sisters out last night so she could study. Grown up! I tell you, they are too grown up!

The amount of squabbling yesterday afternoon and this morning reminded me they are not adults yet though. Part of me is now waiting for the squabbling to stop. Part of me is a little bit glad that I still have a few years left. Part of me wanted to throw things at them.

So faith and love have been covered. The chocolate part is for me! Mamas who are preparing for empty nests need chocolate.

When your children politely ask if you are going to get another dog to keep you company when they move out, you also know you need to start making plans! If you interested in finding out what I am planning for my post-high-school-children life .... please check out Kris' Angels.


*PS in defence of DB (see what a lovely ex-wife I am): I haven't seen him in ages, but he does always come around for the girls' birthdays unless he is away and he normally has them the Friday nights he is home. He also did all the cooking for the girls' confirmation lunch. The Pixie was just being a grouch.

When the cat is away ....

I ran away this weekend. I took a break from reality and ran away. No blogging when you are being a runaway.

I took Friday off work. I slept in, got my nails done, took Flip-Flop to the beach, had a spontaneous lunch date, and had a (very) long nap. (I also did a few loads of washing, and went to the doctor to get my iron checked, but that is heaps less exciting and not fun at all).

The reason for this extravagance was it is that my best friend from primary school is getting married and I am honoured to be one of her bridesmaids. We have been friends since we were five, and I am so, so excited to be a part of her day!

This weekend was the hens' weekend, so we had a catch-up sleepover Friday night, wine tour Saturday, and we drank and ate and laughed long into the night. Grown-up pyjama party at its finest! I met some lovely new people, and had a wonderful time (I think she did too!).

Also did you know you can get coke macarons?! They are amazing. This is fairly irrelevant to anything, but I thought you should know.

From a selfish point of view, I gave myself a very much needed break from real life, and I almost feel ready to face the final sprint of my study.

My running away meant the girls spent the weekend with DB. DB having the girls for the weekend meant that he spent a fair bit of time at my house while they were at dancing because of all the running backwards and forwards. DB being at my house meant that the rabbit's hutch has been turned into a new veranda for Flip-Flop's kennel. Apparently if the rabbit returns she is getting a new hutch that he's been planning anyway. I don't actually get consulted on these things. I should point out that DB had made the old hutch so it wasn't destroying something I had bought to make it. Although, he did use a set of shelves I had been planning on using for storage to make the hutch in the first place.

 

It also meant that my pond has finally been finished! I am very excited. The water feature has been sitting in the corner of my bedroom for 10 years. The pond has been sitting in my study for about 18 months. The pond and installation of the pond was my Christmas present from 2012 and my birthday present from 2013. I still need to put plants and pots and stuff in, but I am really pleased with how it is looking.

What I had not been expecting was the addition of new pets. They are a present. The fact the yabbies being a present means that I am not allowed to be annoyed that I wasn't consulted, apparently. Fortunately they are yabbies so fairly low maintenance. They were named by the time I got home. I have been informed that this was part of the present. So I may now be the proud owner of yabbies called Stephen, David, Abbey, Gabby, Bobalina, Sushi, Raisin, and Pixie Jnr. No prizes for guessing which of my children named them!

I am now reiterating to my children that you don't give pets as presents unless the recipient has okayed it, even if you do think it was a lovely gesture.

I have given up trying to teach DB this lesson. He has also promised Tink and the Pixie axolotls. Sigh.

Pixie party!

We have finally had the Pixie's birthday party. Have I mentioned before my family is extraordinarily good at moving birthday's to when they suit us? We always do presents and have an icecream cake  on the actual day, but with three "sides" of the family to fit in the rest of it can be somewhat spread out.

We don't always have a "proper" party, but there is always something with friends. Most often a sleepover now they are older. This is partly to help alleviate the mother guilt about lack of play dates (not child manipulated guilt either).

This birthday party has reminded me of a few important life lessons.

Firstly, I love Guides. The main thing that stresses me out about birthday parties is having to clean the house. (Most of the time I have managed to avoid this too). I have worked out over the years that I just tend to treat them like organising a Guide meeting. I would like to say that this is not intentional, but this is what I seem to do.

As the girls have gotten older it has been even easier. Sleepovers are awesome, because the girls can organise most of it themselves. They love organising things so for them this is a big part of the fun.

The Pixie did everything this year with a bit of help with the shopping. Massive bonus. She was so proud of herself and excited to be doing it, and it kept her happy for ages. There was a bit of confusion with the invites where she had the party going from Friday night to Sunday morning (apparently I am not always that good at proof reading), but we overcame that hurdle. Thank goodness! Just because I can handle five 11-year-olds for a weekend, doesn't mean I want to.

Another part of minor confusion arose when the Pixie wanted to know what time Apple and Mr Apple were coming. She had made them lolly bags, and she was very anxious about how the pizza would arrive if they weren't here to pick it up. I did point out that usually you invite people if you want them to be at your party. Pixie was adamant that they didn't need an invitation they would just be there "because that is what they do". They were there, and the pizza was collected.

It also reminded me why being on good terms with your ex can be very useful (even when you are not talking to them).

Sorting out the cake is DB's job. Although considering he dropped the cake off with three very hyped up girls who had eaten chocolate mousse for breakfast (the Minion is filled with mousse, I am not exactly sure why, but it was yummy) and then left ..... I have a sneaking suspicion that when it comes to sleepover parties he has sussed out the easy part of the deal.

An Officer and a Pixie

Since she could talk, the Pixie wanted to be an archaeologist. Except for one year, when she was about 4, and she desperately wanted to be a mermaid, but even then I think it was her back-up plan.

Pixie had it all sussed. She was going to be an archaeologist because she liked bones and old things, and she was going to find them with treasure in the shallow water because she didn't like deep water. This last bit may have only eventuated after she decided that being a mermaid didn't seem likely to happen.

Her career had started. She had a bone collection, all carefully labelled in permanent marker with the year she found them. Having friends who are farmers massively helps in the collection of bones, just in case anyone is looking for tips.

As for clothing, Pixie had requested a high vis suit for when she got her real job: "A suit like you wear to work Mummy, but made out of high vis stuff like Daddy's work shirt". At least no-one would miss her!

But now we have had a change of direction .... in the last twelve months, Pixie has had a change of career goal.

Officer Pixie



Pixie has developed a love for the show 'RBT'. I blame DB. I don't let her watch it. Ok, I should re-phrase, I don't let her watch it but there may be times (ie before exams and when I have assignments due) where I may not be the most vigilant parent, but I am pretty sure one of the advantages I get to being a single parent is blaming DB when they do things like this.

Unfortunately, her desire to join the police is based on the fact that she "likes laughing at stupid people". As much as I have pointed out that this is not ok, and that not all cops are on tv. There is no budging her on this one. As she points out drink driving is stupid, so I can't really argue on that point.

I went through a RBT on Friday night after taking Tink and her friend to the drive-ins. Pixie was most upset I hadn't gone to pick her up from her friend's house where she was sleeping over to take her through as well. She was slightly mollified this evening when we saw a police car with flashing lights and even more so when there were two cars with flashing lights pulled over by the side of the road looking for something (someone?!) in the bushes.

I should say at this point that I think the police force do an amazing job in very difficult circumstances, I am just not sure I want to wish my ditzy youngest daughter on them. I liked the idea of her doing archaeology; academia seemed like a nice safe place to protect the world from Pixie and somewhere her eccentricities would be appreciated.

Master Chef Minors

Sunday soccer bought an added bonus today. My mother-in-law and step-father-in-law came to watch and bought the girls a cookbook as a present, and ones with lots of vegetarian recipes which is a bonus because I am the world's worst vegetarian mother and I have no imagination.

This meant that Tink spent hours this afternoon picking out recipes and marking them. Buglet was out being a teenager, and Pixie was asleep so some quiet study time for me!

This was great until the Pixie woke up and had a massive tantrum because I had told her that she could make dinner. Oops. Study brain fail!

Peace was restored when Tink agreed that the recipe she had picked out would be a good alternative for Taco Tuesday, and peace reigned again.

Pixie picked home made pizzas for dinner, which to be honest was not in the book, but that is ok.

Super yummy! Tink and Pixie made them together. My vegetarian-baby will not touch meat. Her carnivorous mother does not feel it is really pizza without meat. I know I have said it before, but the fact I ended up with a vegetarian child is really one of life's great mysteries.

Pixie also has a very short attention span ... except when it comes to remembering rules that she likes, when it suits her. Buglet was greeted with a shouted: "You have to do the dishes all by yourself, because we made dinner!!!". Usually this is a major point of contention because Buglet does so much of the cooking, and Pixie does not understand the concept of sharing the workload.

This is especially ironic because we'd had this conversation a very short time beforehand.

Me: Pixie! I told you to pick up that lettuce that you dropped.
Pixie: It wasn't me.
Me: So it just magically appeared after you had salad, but it wasn't you?
Pixie: No. It was Flip-Flop. She dropped when she stole my bowl.
Me: GO AND CLEAN IT UP!
*repeat conversation five minutes later, possibly more than once*
Me: Why are you so much hard work?
Pixie: Are you made at me?
Me: Yes. I shouldn't have to ask you to clean up your own mess so many times.
Pixie: But not very mad. Because you lovells me. I will cuddle you. Then you will not be mad.

Luckily for her the hard work sometimes pays off.

In happy news, I am little bit excited that the little two are deciding to embrace cooking. As super awesome as it is that Buglet loves to cook, I am always worried that the novelty will wear off.

I also am sneakily trying to get them interested in gardening. That will be a good project for them to do with DB when I am not at home. Daddy-daughter time, and I don't have to worry about my garden.

As my final sneaky good parenting moment of the day, I was discussing with my father-in-law how awesome it would be if he could teach the girls how to do stuff on cars. He enjoys working with cars and the girls love helping him do stuff.

The secret of being a good manager is not knowing how to do everything yourself, but knowing how to delegate to the right people. This applies to parenting to right?

Armed and dangerous: Part 2 of my weekend

Sunday is family day. I try to stick to this. Mostly unsuccessfully, but it is the thought that counts!

Buglet managed to convince us that she should have her birthday present's today. Her reasoning was that Daddy was spending the day with us and because tomorrow (her actual birthday) is a Monday, and that Monday's are super busy. This is true.

I mostly gave in because one of the Buglet's birthday presents was The Host (on dvd, she got the book last Christmas), and that made a nice diversion between Tink's soccer and the main attraction of the day ..... lazar tag!

Today was a just a "house family" celebration. With a massive family, birthday celebrations can go over the whole month. Originally we were going to do something with her friends, but that didn't work out so a family session at lazar tag it was. I do maintain my right as their mother to claim their birthdays as my special days too! Not only am I the one who actually gave birth, each year is another year I get to celebrate how much they have grown, and that we all have survived.

Lazar tag was not only great fun, it was very educational too.

What we learnt at lazar tag:

• we are all ultra competitive;
• real men can wear pink;
• Tink has the makings of an officer;
• Tink has a scary number of tactics;
• don't get on the Buglet's bad side, she started a vendetta against the other dad playing who was the only person to obtain a higher score than her in the first game;
• DB refuses to follow instructions especially when the instructions are "don't shoot me I am on the same team";
• three out of five of us really need to work on our aim; and
• despite my best efforts the girls still didn't know who C3PO was (the character name Tink was given).

Some of these things we should probably have known earlier.

Proud mama moments of the day ~ lazar tag edition:

• my girls weren't the ones sulking when they got hit; and
• Tink obeying the international law protecting the injured even from the other side (aka a small crying child who was lost).

There is something ironic about shooting other people's children celebrating a parenting milestone. Or possibly therapeutic. Probably better for family relations that we were all on the same team. DB suggested paintballing. Lucky the girls are not old enough. I really will need to work on my aim before then!

Je t'aime

If you thought the most aggressive way someone could say "I love you" was when it was said by an angry teenager, I think you may be wrong.

DB taught the girls a new trick this weekend. Fortunately the big two lost interest by the time they came home. Pixie on the other hand mastered the shouting and the loving her mama bit, but missed the point of the rest of the exercise.

I am not sure what is worse a tiny little angry Pixie shouting "Attention! I love you!" when you are not sure what you are doing wrong, or a big man shouting "Achtung! Ich liebe dich!" in your face when you are not sure what he is even talking about. At least then you do not need to respond. At least I know they care, right?

My lovely moment today was watching Tink and the Pixie helping at a crèche this afternoon. There is something wonderful about watching your children teach younger kids games and songs, and be the caring big ones. They grow up so fast! And then Buglet  making us a beautiful steak dinner (well, minus steak for the vegetarian child) including the mushroom and mustard sauce I love, but that none of the girls like.

No more writing for me tonight, the Pixie wants a cuddle, and watching how grown up they all were today I have been reminded that  wanting cuddles won't last forever.